Ever feel like your life was a picture-perfect lie? I did. I had the husband, the big house, the adorable baby boy. But underneath all of that, the cracks were forming. And when my marriage imploded, my once picture perfect world crumbled around me.
Becoming a single mom felt like the worst day of my life. In the span of a few weeks I went from having it all to scrambling for survival. A new apartment, a tight budget, the challenges of solo parenting. My son was constantly sick with ear infections, my already limited PTO was dwindling, and I was drowning in debt that only existed for our survival. Exhaustion and self-doubt became my new companions. I felt like I was failing my son, unable to just enjoy those early days of new life.
In those darkest times, I still found myself clinging to small acts of defiance. I painted my son’s new bedroom the same warm, cozy gray as his old one, his toys and pictures splashes of bright on his walls. I bought a ridiculously cheerful bright teal rug at Walmart, a splash of color in my stark new reality. These weren’t priorities, but they were lifelines. I needed those tiny anchors of normalcy to help me in these new waters.
Then, a lifeline. My parents offered us a place to stay. A chance to rebuild. It felt like a step backward, moving back home at 31. But my best friend, Tiffany, gave it to me straight. She said, “You’re stupid if you turn this down.” She was right.
After losing my job that I’d spent 5 years at, renewed determination became the only thing I had that wasn’t indebted to someone else. We all moved into The Big House, my parents, my son, myself, and the menagerie. I enrolled in community college, finally going after my dream of a bachelor’s degree. I traded accounting for Management Information Systems, joined a supportive community, and even got through the pandemic on my way to graduating Magna Cum Laude.
It wasn’t easy. There were late nights finishing projects and studying while my son slept, panicked pleas to my mom when deadlines and childcare collided, and moments when I wanted to throw in the towel. I lost my dog, William, to epilepsy. I lost my grandmother to a stroke. I lost my shit fairly consistently. There were nights I finished school projects after cleaning up a late night puking episode. But I kept going. I had to.
And then, a breakthrough. I stumbled on a job posting - a perfect fit for my skills and experience at the very same community college I had attended. It felt like destiny. I landed the job, and with it, a sense of stability that I hadn’t felt in years.
But I didn’t stop there. I was determined to build a truly secure future for myself and my son. I budgeted, saved, and planned with fierce intensity. I learned everything I could about personal finance, tackled my debt, and finally, bought my own home.
My career continued to blossom. I networked, honed my skills, and looked for every opportunity for growth. When an email landed in my inbox announcing an open position with a significant pay raise, I jumped at the chance. And I got it.
This isn’t a fairytale or a Lifetime Network Movie. This is my life. A life story full of grit, resilience, and the audacity to build a beautiful life from the rubble of a broken one. It’s about finding strength in unexpected places, celebrating small victories, and never giving up on your dreams.
And sometimes, it all starts with a ridiculously cheerful rug from Walmart. That rug, a symbol of color in my little apartment, reminded me that even in all of the chaos, even in all of the struggle, I could create a space of beauty and comfort for my son and me. It was a symbol of hope, a small act of defiance in the face of overwhelming odds.
Looking back, I realize that rug represents so much more than just a floor covering. It represents the power of small choices, the importance of finding joy in the everyday, and the belief that when life knocks you down, you can always get back up.
If you’re a single mom feeling lost and overwhelmed, please know this - you are not alone. You are strong, capable, and worthy of a beautiful life. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, take help when it’s given, celebrate your wins, and find your own “Walmart rug” - that small thing that brings you joy and reminds you of your strength.
This is my blueprint. What will yours be?